What is wrong with me?

So, I tried to change up that distracting, hideous background,and this is what I got. It's not exactly like I intended. And I'm too pregnant to change it.

Apparently, I am too pregnant to take pictures either. I don't think my camera has been out of the case in at least 30 days. I'm a terrible mother.

I am sure for most of you, Christmas seems months away and not of your current concern. Well, for me, since this baby will be coming pre-Christmas, I have been trying to finish Christmas shopping.

Ya'll, it's hard to Christmas shop with Halloween candy and decor on every aisle.

But, I am determined to be done by Thanksgiving. That's right. Done. By. Thanksgiving.

The great thing is I am nearly done with the kids. (Melts my heart to say "kids," like, with a "s" on the end.) And nearly half of the adults and all the other kids (you know, that aren't mine) are taken care of, as well. So, I am making progress. I will complete this mission.

Speaking of missions......

I debated about telling you about our most recent fiasco, but I may as well.

Little and I attended a beautiful outdoor wedding this past weekend. It is to be envied by every other outdoor wedding. The weather alone was absolutely perfect.

The wedding took place on the pier of a pond, with the reception surrounding a lovely pool.

Had I known how the night would end, we would have skipped the wedding and sent our condolences later. However, with the series of events that have occurred over the past few months, I should have known.

Little and Sweetmama (my grandmother, Little's great-grandmother) were busy traveling back and forth to various reception tables, in particular, the candy table. They had made several trips with great success. Then......

It happened. I had just turned to look at Little and Sweetmama traveling around the pool. And as I am sitting with my back to the pool, I hear a splash. I jump up, run to the side of the pool, and see my grandmother and daughter in the swimming pool.

Mother's instinct is get the child (who cannot swim) out of the pool. And so, I jump in and realize we are in the deep end. I grab Little from my grandmother and hand her to someone standing at the edge of the pool. I have no idea who. It could have been anyone. Mission I is to get the baby out of the pool.

Mission II get my grandmother out of the pool. I grab her hand and pull her to the side. A few men come to assist her out. And now I'm the only one in the pool, so my pastor encouraged me to swim to the shallow end to exit the pool.

Everyone was okay. The water was cold. The night was cool. We all realize the blessings because of what could have been. (Especially considering that my grandmother later informs me that she cannot swim.)

Now, let me back up and tell you, I had on a dress. In case you are unaware, when you jump in water in a dress, the first thing your dress does is float to the surface. I think my dress ended up around my neck. And there was plenty of pregnant meat to be shown.

Apparently your dress will have no concern as to how many people are witnessing your dress around your neck. Your dress laughs at the fact that your pastor is standing there. Your dress could care less if you are 32 weeks pregnant.

Your dress (probably sensing that you are furious with it), in a last ditch effort to reconcile, snuggles with you relentlessly when you exit the pool, therefore, clinging to every bump and bulge. Your dress was a very bad dress.

I just cannot look anyone in the eye anymore.

And that dress is in dire need of some punishment for what it did to me and all those innocent bystanders.